If the writing’s on the wall for childhood, spray the designers too

Mar 5 2008 by Abbie Wightwick, Western Mail

A SURVEY out this week claimed childhood has taken a nose dive.

More than half of parents think their children’s childhood is over by the time they walk through the secondary school gates.

I was getting all worked up about this and worried that my children would be going grey by 15 at this rate.

Then it dawned on me that a lot of childhood is over by 11 – and a good thing too. The pre-teen years are pretty bad, it’s true, but they do leave some of the worst parts of childhood behind.

No longer do you have to suffer your parents blowing your nose, answer bizarre questions such as “Do you need a wee?” or drink milk at school.

My 10-year-old daughter is pretty pleased that, as she can now offer coherent arguments on why she should have her way, we must, at least, listen. We may disagree on whether she can have a mobile phone and fly to Paris for the weekend for her birthday, but we must explain why. The simple reasons you might give a six-year-old “because you’ll lose it and we can’t afford it’’ simply won’t wash.

She is no longer tied to apron strings and is looking forward to freedom and independence.

It’s an exciting and scary time. Sometimes she’s still my “baby” and sometimes I see the future before my eyes. She can help lost children at the swimming pool, can ask policeman for help if she gets lost and tells me when I’ve got her maths homework wrong.

Childhood is ever changing and thank God for that. What is good about being unable to do the weekly supermarket run without dressing your five-year-old as Snow White? Where is the fun in potty training and do I get paid for knowing the script to every single Mr Men book?

Most teenagers and adults still display childhood desires and needs.

My five-year-old’s Top Trump cards are currently his father’s favourite toy.

Personally I like my daughter’s Philip Pullman collection and discussing the naughtiest things we have ever done.

She thinks it was “stupid” of me to graffiti my name on a classroom wall aged 11 because I instantly identified myself. She must therefore be, either more sophisticated or else not as naughty.

Either way, it’s probably a good thing as I would not condone writing on walls. Then again, perhaps the world would be a poorer place without it. What about cave paintings and Roman, Greek and Egyptian carvings?

Childhood just depends, as does petty crime, on the way you look at it. If I had a spare can of spray paint I would definitely direct it onto the drawing boards of children’s fashion designers.

I would consider this a public service rather than crime.